New Release – Ant-Head: A Love Story
It’s new release Tuesday, and I’m celebrating the release of my eleventh self-published work Ant-Head: A Love Story!
Ant-Head is the tale of Joe Plume, star and narrator. But I won’t talk it up too much. I’ll let Joe do it himself via the blurb that appears on Amazon.
But first, please allow me to link some of the fun stuff I’ve been posting around this release day celebration:
There’s tons more on my Twitter feed from today. Check it out here: @BudgieBigelow
OK… On to Joe’s preview
If you’re reading this, you’re thinking of purchasing my book.
Congratulations on being literate, seriously. I’m Joe Plume, fictional character, charismatic narrator, star of Ant-Head: A Love Story, the book you’ll likely be purchasing in the immediate future.
I’m not only a bad-ass narrating machine, but a writer too. I haven’t written a book like Ant-Head: A Love Story, though. I leave that to the guy’s whose name is on my book. My forte is fan fiction based on old sitcoms. Think of them as episodes of your favorite shows written by amateurs written out in short story form and posted on the internet.
But you want to hear about this book, not the art of fan fiction writing.
My story is a story of love, as you probably figured out from the subtitle. Enter Tammy: the new woman at work. She was new to everyone else but me. You see, I knew her from a time in my life when I was known as Ant-Head. Only, she doesn’t remember me.
OK… So I’d explain this whole “Ant-Head” thing, but the incident is best described by me in the prologue of the book. Amazon lets you read the first ten percent of it, so have at it. Wait… make sure to finish this blurb first.
Anyway, Tammy and I crowbarred ourselves into each other’s lives. We’re no Ross and Rachel, but we hit it off well enough. She’s a single mom, too. Her son is eight-year-old Landon, a fatherless boy looking for a role model. I do have some wisdom I can give the young lad. I remember a lesson from that episode of Punky Brewster where Punky’s friend learned the hard way that you shouldn’t hide in a refrigerator during a game of hide and seek. You’ll suffocate, dummies. It’s a good thing they also learned CPR earlier that same episode. I also learned about the dangers of drugs from the classic episode of Saved by the Bell where Jessie gets addicted to diet pills.
Boy, did I love Jessie Spano. I remember getting my hands on a VHS copy of Showgirls and watching it until the tape was all staticky from constant rewinding. Don’t judge me. Any true fan of Saved by the Bell masturbated to that movie at least a hundred times. Amazon has it on Blu-ray. Why don’t you add it to your cart right after you add this book? It can be our little secret.
Let’s get back on track… There is a conflict to my story. I don’t want you to think it’s just me rambling on about sitcoms and whatnot. The conflict of my story comes in the form of the conflict we all must endure (unless you’re asexual): the relationship. Yes, there are speed bumps on my road to love. I wasn’t planning to be thrust into a relationship with a single mother, and I don’t take to it well.
Come on. We can’t all be Danny Tanner right out of the gate!
The point I’m trying to make is that Ant-Head: A Love Story is an endearing, one-of-a-kind romantic comedy. It’s full of laughs, tears, cringes, sitcom references, more laughs, and maybe another tear or two. I may be partial, being the narrator and star, but I think you should buy this book. Buy it good and hard.
This is Joe Plume, ending this blurb.
Want to read Joe Plume’s entire story? Check out the entire book here:
Ant-Head: A Love Story by Budgie Bigelow
Available in digital or paperback!