Budgie’s Journal #102 – The Great Joke of the Unseen Higher Beings

Who am I? 

I’ve asked myself this question several times over the last week or so, and I still don’t have an answer.

What am I?

Another question, it’s answer shrouded in the gray area that has become my life.

Where am I going?

I don’t know. I really don’t.

All I know is what I was, and even that seems distorted in the static of selective memory. People change, it’s in their nature. So how do I change in order to adapt to this new life that seems to have been chosen for me? 

I’ve made some life-changing choices over the last week; and I’ve been optimistic so far about them, but what am I supposed to do on the days I wake up and feel like every choice I’ve ever made was a mistake that led up to this single melancholy morning?

Take a breath, power through, and tell myself that things will get better.

My choices are made, and they feel like the right ones. Now I just wait and see what happens…

Things will get better.

-Budgie Bigelow


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