Budgie’s Journal #65 – Finding Balance

Professional. Creativity. Love.

These are the three aspects of my life in constant flux. I work for a living, I write as a passion, and I have a complex personal life. But when one of the three goes “out of whack” the others end up shifting and distorting as well.

I’ve maintained this balance well for the better part of the last few weeks, maybe more than a month. But one had become distorted over the last few days, and the balance is shifting.

The love portion is becoming unbalanced, and it’s sending ripples through the other portions. I’m lacking the drive to do much of anything at work, and I can’t focus on my writing. 

So how do I fix this?

I took an introspective look at myself after pulling my daily tarot card, the Ace of Disks. There’s nothing actually wrong with my love / home life. My wife and I are still in love, and everything else is running smoothly. What had become skewed was my own perception. I look at my loved ones being busy or dealing with their own problems as my own fault, and doing so isn’t fair to anyone. I felt alone, when I shouldn’t have.

So tonight I’m goinh to take a step back, using my alone time to focus on myself and find my own harmony. I have a lot of writing that’s begging to be done, books I want to read, and my work for the week is nearly at its end. It’s Friday after all.

So I’ll be finding my balance, making peace with that one part of me that so desperately needs it. Hopefully I’ll be in harmony before my head hits the pillow tonight.

-Budgie Bigelow


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