Every once in a great while, a movie comes along so huge it can only mean one thing: it’s Freedom Lane da’ Movie 2 in Space. Join the elderly Helen and Rose Masters, their adopted teenage son Da’Quarius, and his pizzeria-owning Uncle Paulie as they embark on their greatest adventure to date.
Rose is holding a letter in her shaking hands. “This says Da’Quarius has to go back.”
“Where?” Helen asks. “Back to Africa?”
“Dammit, biddy!” Da’Quarius snaps, jumping from his place on the couch. “You know I ain’t never been to Africa!”
“No,” Rose says, shaking her head. “Back to the orphanage.”
“Who says he has to go back?” Helen asks.
“President Trump,” Rose replies, tears streaming down her face.
How far will one family go in order to keep themselves together when faced with the greatest challenge of their lives?
“You need to stay calm,” Helen says, walking through the White House by Rose’s side. “I don’t need your inner hippy coming to the surface, causing you to throw a tampon at our commander in chief.”
“I don’t use tampons anymore, so stop bringing them up,” Rose says. “And he’s not my damn President!”
“That’s just what I’m talking about,” Helen mutters.
Da’Quarius and Paulie are waiting outside the White House. “I wonder what’s taking them so long,” Paulie says. A moment later, two police cruisers pull up, lights flashing. Rose is dragged out.
“LET ME GO SO I CAN KICK TRUMP’S SPRAY-TANNED ASS!” she shouts.
Helen is dragged out right behind her. “IF YOU HURT ONE HAIR ON MY WOMAN’S HEAD, I’LL BEAT YOU ALL TO DEATH!”
Now, one family faces separation as the consequences of their actions.
“Helen and I have to turn ourselves in to spend an entire month in prison,” Rose tells Paulie, sitting in the kitchen of her Freedom Lane home. “I don’t want Da’Quarius to know and worry about us. I want you to chaperone his trip to Space Camp while Helen and I are away in case he somehow finds out.”
“Sure,” Paulie says, putting his hand on top of Roses. “I can entrust my pizzeria to Tony for the next month. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
“No way!” Tony exclaims, having heard from Paulie everything that has been going on. “I’m going to this space camp with you. Look at the pamphlet! It says ‘blast off to adventure’ right on the front.”
“This isn’t a friggin’ adventure!” Paulie shouts, his hands flailing.
Paulie, Tony, Da’Quarius, and a handful of kids from camp literally blast off to adventure when they’re accidentally rocketed into space.
Da’Quarius and Paulie are in the cockpit of a space shuttle. Sparks and smoke are coming from some of the circuits. “What the frig are we supposed to do now?!” Paulie shouts.
“Suit up an’ strap yo’ ass in,” Da’Quarius says. “We goin’ to space.”
Paulie and Da’Quarius, along with four other kids and Tony, float onto a space station, looking around. “Anyone know where the shitter is?” Tony asks. “I got a growler that’s been trying to force its way out since Florida.”
This July, loyalty and courage are put to the test as an unlikely group has to band together in order to figure out just how to get home from aboard a space station owned by the one person they should never, ever attempt to cross.
The entire group comes into a large, circular room with a desk bolted to the floor. In the center, a logo with the name “TRUMP-1” is painted.
“We’re definitely fucked,” Da’Quarius said.
Freedom Lane da’ Movie 2 in Space. Coming this July from Budgie Bigelow and BluntSharpness.
“That’s awesome,” Manny Garcia says, standing inside Paulie’s Pizza. “Can you even imagine that?”
“I know, right!” Antonio, Manny’s brother says. “It’s like one of those space camp movies from the eighties.”
“Which one?” Manny asks.
“Space Camp!” Antonio replies.
“Oh yeah,” Manny says. “I gotta see if Netflix has that.”
Freedom Lane da’ Movie 2 in Space
Coming July sixth for Amazon Kindle or Kindle App‼