“Hi,” Budgie says, sitting in his studio chair. “I’m Budgie Bigelow, and I’m interviewing one of the characters from my upcoming book ‘Blood Drive’. Today, I’m welcoming Bart Peters of Pennsylvania.”
Bart nods, tipping a styrofoam cup in a mock salute. There’s dark brown sludge inside. He has an un-groomed beard and head of hair of the same reddish brown. He’s wearing a a flannel shirt that’s only buttoned halfway.
“Tell me about your role in Blood Drive,” Budgie says. “You come in as the wildcard of the group.”
“I wouldn’t put it that way,” Bart says, spitting into his cup. “Those two blood suckers couldn’t do squat without me, and their bosses know it. So they paid me to tag along and make sure they didn’t fuck the whole mission up.”
“You’re a werewolf too, is that correct?” Budgie asks.
“Yeah, I’m a damn werewolf,” Bart says, growing agitated. “One of the few in America too like muh daddy ‘fore me. Europe is lousy with ‘em, but wouldn’t go over there with all ‘em limeys and frogs. No sir.”
“How does a werewolf benefit the mission to transport the blood cross-country?” Budgie asks.
Bart spits into his cup again. “Vampires are a bunch of pansy asses, and those two I had to ride with ain’t no different. They don’t wanna mess up those polished nails of theirs, so they need a guy like me to do the dirty work. If anyone gets in their way, the wolf can handle ‘em no problem.”
“So you end up doing all the hard work?” Budgie asks.
“The fuck did I just say?” Bart asks in return. “Are y’all deaf or stupid or both?
“But you’d only he useful at night,” Budgie says. “Under the moon.”
Bart laughs once, spitting once more into his cup. “I don’t need no damn moonlight. I’ve been shootin’ since I was big enough to walk and swing my johnny.”
“What?” Budgie asks.
Bart sighs, reaching behind him and pulling a revolver from the waistband of his old jeans. “See this ‘un? I shit you not, muh daddy had me shoot one just like it when I was just two years old. Recoil nearly knocked me on my ass too.”
“How’d you get that in here?!” Budgie asks, visibly shaken.
“This is America,” Bart said, waving his gun. “And I have the God-given right to arm myself. So you see now that I don’t need to turn into no werewolf to get shit done.”
“Well, that just about wraps this interview up,” Budgie says. “Thank you, Bart, for stopping by, and the book is called ‘Blood Drive’, due out this fall.
“Whatever,” Bart says, putting his gun back. “Where do I get paid?”