Where Are They Now: Saved By The Bell

Do you remember spending Saturday mornings with Zack, Kelly, AC, Screech, Jessie, and Lisa on Saved By The Bell? Does it make you feel old to know that the characters would be entering their forties this year?! This begs the question: Where would these six best friends be twenty-two years after graduating from Bayside High?


Screech

Samuel “Screech” Powers worked for Bayside High for a few years after college, helping Mr. Belding usher in a new class of students. As a side project, he began to develop his own computer operating system originally designed to help his robot companion, Kevin, learn new chess moves. After Bayside was decimated by the fire, Screech went public with his project, Screech.0. A bidding war between Apple and Microsoft ensued, and Screech.0 sold for seventy-five million dollars.

Screech’s only regret in life is that he is no longer in contact with his friends from Bayside. He even sold his Kevin to NASA to run digging equipment on Mars. He lost touch when everyone went their separate ways, only catching up every now and then at random times in their lives. The only time he heard from his former best friend, Zack, was when he got the phone call for the two to catch up, but it turned out that Zack needed a large loan to get him and Kelly back on their feet. The two have only spoken a few times since Screech cut him a check for sixty thousand dollars, and he doesn’t expect to ever get the money back. He just hoped it helped.

Where is Screech today? Screech is sitting in the study of his New Mexico mansion while his wife, Dominique, is lounging poolside. He looks at the picture from high-school he keeps framed on his desk. His eye lingers on Lisa for a moment. He watches her TV show as a guilty pleasure when his wife isn’t around. The photo is of the six of them in the band they all took part in, Zack Attack, and they had just wrote and performed the song Friends Forever. Screech laughs at the irony before getting to work on a group of apps that will be sure revolutionize tablet programing.


Lisa

LIsta Tuttle didn’t stay still after school ended. After dropping out of college in her third year, she entered into the world of acting. There weren’t many roles that she fit, and she lived off of her father’s money for as long as he allowed it. Once he began threatening to cut her off if she didn’t start making a living for herself, she latched onto a pro football player named Rossi LaCosta. The two were together for eight months before they were married. 

Lisa’s marriage to LaCosta resulted in her appearance in the reality series “California Football Wives“, where she was teamed up with four other wives of NFL players living in California. Lisa became the star of the show after telling off one of the other wives and dumping a pot of goulash into the sunroof of her car. She was able to turn this into personal appearances and a book deal as well. Zack had called her numerous times over the seven seasons the show ran, and each idea to promote his ventures through her seemed more far fetched than the last. Inevitably, it all came crashing down around her.

Rossi LaCosta was caught cheating on Lisa and was arrested for his involvement in a canary fighting ring. The show was cancelled, and Lisa divorced LaCosta. She started her own reality show called “Lisa Out Loud” on a lesser network. She even had AC Slater on an episode when she visited a wrestling show where he was performing. 

Today, Lisa is clinging to what little celebrity she has left. She has gotten very used to signing on the dotted line, and has a contract in front of her to release a sex tape she made when she was thirty-four with rapper Lil’ Queef that was leaked to TMZ. She bites on her pen, deciding whether or not to sign. She thinks back on her days at Bayside High and wonders what her friends would tell her to do. Ignoring the argument they were making in her head to not do the tape, Lisa signs the paper in front of her.


Slater

AC Slater tried out to wrestle in the olympics some years after High School. He did well, but he was told he was out of his prime, and he should concentrate on something else. He started professionally wrestling for a friend’s budding league out of San Diego, and he was quickly noticed by a WWE (WWF at the time) scout. Vince MacMahon was looking for Californian character, and signed AC on the spot. He started wrestling for the WWF as Awesome AC.

Awesome AC was Slater’s version of what he thought Zack Morris sounded like. He’d flex his muscles and give all the women wrestlers a “cool dude” line as he pranced around in bright neon swim trunks. He knew his character was a joke, but the fans loved him, and he was making more money than he ever would have wrestling in the olympics. He even held the Intercontinental Championship for five and a half months. Zack had even called, wanting AC to join him in some business venture or another, but his WWF contract luckily prevented him from doing it.

Awesome AC’s wrestling career took a huge hit when a german suplex damaged his spine. The surgery to correct the injury took him out of action for over eight months. When he returned during theRoyal Rumble, the fans were excited, but they never really got back into his character.

Due to poor crowd reaction, AC was forced to wrestle in non-televised events. When his contract was up for renewal, the WWF turned it down. AC kept his head up, though. He began wrestling for small, independent wrestling federations across America. He never stayed in one place for too long, so he only rented. He was happy to see Lisa Tuttle at one of his events, but his happiness turned sour when he found out that it was only a stunt for one of her reality shows. He didn’t realize until later that she was trying to help him breath life into his career, and he felt awful for the way he had snapped at her.

Awesome AC is still wrestling. He has settled in New Jersey and travels up and down the east coast for his matches. He misses California, but there is no place for him there now. He was shocked when he heard the news about Jessie, and he was even more shocked when he started calling the others to find out that they hadn’t heard (the few that he still had numbers for anyway). If you’re in a crowded school gym on a Friday night, watching a wrestling show, you might just get to see Awesome AC in action.


Kelly

Kelly Kapowski was married to Zack Morris while the two were still in college. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but the mistake of not waiting until they were older became clearer and clearer as the years dragged on. Zack was never a nine to five kind of guy, and Kelly never thought he’d end up tied down to a corporate gig. He was smart, but he just had no ambition to sit at a desk all day. She had faith that he’d make it on his own, and Zack was determined enough.

Kelly was pregnant with their fourth child when Zack finally had his break down. He was involved with several get-rich-quick schemes or business ventures. His surfboard radio company went belly-up, and Zack’s mental state deteriorated for years to come.

Kelly worked while Zack stayed home with the kids. Their credit card debt finally caught up with them, and Kelly begged Zack to ask Screech for a small loan. She would have gone herself; but Zack and Screech had been best friends, and Zack needed a friend in his life. He was supposed to ask for twenty thousand to pay off their debt, but Zack asked for sixty instead. She had every intention on paying Screech back every dime, but Zack spent all of it on another scheme that failed as soon as it took off, leaving them completely broke with no way to pull themselves out of debt.

Kelly now lives on her own with her six children in a cramped apartment, living off the state of California and any money she could make under the table. She curses the day she met Zack Morris and wishes she chose Slater.


Jessie

Jessie Spano had to get her life back on track after college. She spent way too much time experimenting with pot and lesbianism to concentrate on making the world a better place. She said goodbye to her girlfriend, Sandra, and joined a commune in the midst of a forest with no electricity, phone, or outside government. There she stayed for the bulk of her life, living off the land and praising mother Gaia.

When she finally returned to society, she was shocked to see what had happened. The world had given into digital slavery. Nobody could walk ten feet without some electronic device in their hand and against their heads. Threats were everywhere, and nobody seemed to have their heads out of the sand. She decided it was time to take up her old causes once again.

After a failed attempt to promote the Yes All Women movement, Jessie sunk into a deep depression. She had given into the cellular demons to promote her causes, and she had nothing to show for it. She was able to land a job at non-profit company in San Francisco, but it paid just enough to pay rent on a one-bedroom apartment. She knew a life of changing people’s mind would be difficult, but she didn’t seem to be changing everyone’s mind.

Then her boss had an idea that could change everything.

Jessie’s task would be simple. She would go to the Middle East with a small group of people, spreading the word of peace and love throughout. The world would see what they were doing, and they would start to change minds from the heart of all the hatred. She was in Saudi Arabia for three days before her group was captured by Isis. She was beheaded in a video that was released to all media outlets. Barely anyone say it, because Kim Kardashian had changed her hair color that same week.


Zack

Zack Morris had a rough life once he was out of college. He and Kelly started their lives together with a baby six months after graduation. Zack celebrated by starting his first business venture: Buddy Bands 2. The company he started in his garage failed immediately, and he moved on to the next one.

Zack’s father floated him along for a while, and Zack hit up all of his friends for loans or partnerships (except for Jessie since she seemed to fall off the face of the earth). Nothing panned out as Kelly kept pumping out baby after baby. It was finally too much and Zack threw a television through a store window before running from the cops and hiding in a dumpster for six hours.

Boyish looks and a charming smile was only able to land Zack a waiter job (which he had to work at night since Kelly now had a day job at a supermarket), but he got fired for deciding it was the right decision to pull a prank on his mean boss. He thought he would get a slap on the wrist from the management and the praise of his coworkers, but he was fired on the spot and found it hard to find another job doing even the most menial of tasks.

Kelly had talked him into seeing Screech for the first time in years and asking for a loan to help pay off a chunk of their debt (since he had made such a huge sum of money in computer programming). Zack asked for three times what Kelly said they needed to get out of the hole they dug themselves into. He figured he could pay off the debt and have enough left over to open his own food delivery business that catered only to the beach. The people he went into business with took the entire sixty grand Screech had lent him and disappeared.

The news of all of the money being squandered in another scheme was the last straw for Kelly. She took all of their children and left, moving into a small apartment. Today, Zack lives alone in the basement of a church. He has to leave before anyone comes in the morning to find him squatting. He can still be found near the beach, trying to pull a scam or a get-rich-quick scheme to get back on his feet. He hopes that he could win Kelly back if one if successful.

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2 thoughts on “Where Are They Now: Saved By The Bell

  1. Pingback: Table of Contents | Budgie Bigelow's Blog

  2. Pingback: Table of Contents | Budgie Bigelow's Blog

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